I Surrender.

Surrender: to give oneself up; submit; yield

All to You, I surrender
Everything, every part of me
All to You, I surrender
All of my dreams, all of me

No turning back, I've made up my mind
I'm giving all of my life this time

Your love makes it worth it
Your love makes it worth it
Your love makes it worth it all

*The lyrics to the song above gave me new meaning during worship at a friends Three-O meeting last Friday night with a recap of their recent Chile Mission Trip. I couldn't contain myself. I kept crying during this song. I know God was speaking to me, to surrender ALL of my dreams (including teaching in my own classroom right away) and to give Him everything, every part of me. Often times we listen to worship music, but sing it as we sing any song. That evening, this song contained new meaning to me and God revealed to me that I need to really surrender my will and trust Him with where He's guiding me, no matter the cost.

It's official. I'm almost a Teacher. I have 5 weeks left of Student Teaching and then I will have my California Teaching Credential. So, what's next? Good question. I'm not quite sure, but I know it will be an adventure because it is all in God's hands and He has a plan that I can't even imagine. Lately, my focus has been on this idea of possibly teaching in Africa. I have a huge heart for the kids in Africa, and would love to be a teacher there. At times, it's been hard to focus on teaching here with all the stuff going on in Public Schools and New Teachers most likely not getting hired.

As I reach this turning point in my life, I wonder to myself, what's next for Life as Ms. Elder. Will I teach in a Public School? Will I teach in a Private School? Will I teach at a Charter School? Will I teach in Africa? Will I teach in my own classroom at all in the fall or will I be a Substitute Teacher? Will I even be a teacher my first year with my Teaching Credential? As of now, I have no idea what's next. There is one thing however that I know I will be doing and that is serving God and seeking His guidance in all of this. I know that He is preparing me for something big He has in store for me, but I don't know exactly where or when it is yet. That's where the adventure part of it comes in!

As I was driving home from Solan Vista's Open House tonight, the song by Chris Tomlin came on the radio titled "I will Follow You" and the first part of it says Where You go I'll go, where You stay I'll stay, when You move I'll move...That is exactly where I'm at in regards to my future and what's next after Student Teaching. Where God goes, I'll go, where He stays, I'll stay, where He moves, I'll move. My desire is to follow Him and His will for me, wherever that may take me. It has taken me a while to reach this point, but I'm finally at a place where I've surrendered my will and plans and I'm now open to His will and plans for me. God knows my heart and my passions, even more than I do, so of course wherever He leads me will be far greater than anywhere I can ever see myself. I know I want to teach and I know I love children. If and when I ever get discouraged about it, I listen to this song, and also go back to something the Lord revealed to me during worship sometime. He told me this:

Katie, stop thinking so much about others. What I call you to do is not for everybody and not everybody will understand or support you in it. But I will provide you with everything that you need. Do you trust me? I will provide your needs if I open the door for you to stay in Ghana longer than 2 weeks. Don't try to figure that out now. Stop trying to figure out what I've got next for you. I know the desires of your heart and I will give you them. You have to rely on me daily though. Stop worrying about your future..it's in my hands. Just be willing and open and I'll take care of the rest.

That being said, I'm willing and open to where He goes, where He stays, and where He moves...so that I can follow Him with all my heart. Another thing that I go back to for encouragement is a word my mentor and friend gave me in January 2010. It says this:

Katie, don't compare. Don't contrast. Come to me open-minded, and let me direct your path, for I may have a completely different path for you. Yes, you are chosen. Yes, you are loved. Yes, you are a friend of God. Now watch, and see how the Son of Man turns your whole world upside down for His glory. Glory to God! Shout, glory to God, and in all things, no matter the depth of experience.

I think it's pretty clear what God wants me to do with Life as Ms. Elder...surrender.

So Long 2nd Grade...




 

Last week was my 8th week at Solana Vista Elementary School in Second Grade with Mrs. Hishmeh. and her class. It was definitely a tough week for me. I realized that the hardest thing for me as a teacher will be saying goodbye to my students as they move up to the next grade. Who am I kidding though to not know that would be the hardest part for me? I am such a relational person and children have such a big place in my heart. I was only in this particular class for 8 weeks and I fell in love with these students and would love to teach Second Grade one day. They are eager to learn and highly receptive to love, enthusiasm, and encouragement. Each student is unique and nobody is like anyone else.

 



  

Early in the week, my Master Teacher asked me if everything was alright because I didn't seem like myself. I shared with her that I was having a hard time knowing it was my last week in her class with these students at Solana Vista. I felt as though I finally got comfortable and settled in at this school and then I had to leave. I love the school and all the staff there are wonderful. My teacher encouraged me and reminded me that my next experience will be just as great as this one was. I realized that day that even though I was sad, I needed to make the best of my last week! And so, I did! I enjoyed every last minute of it. (as you can see to the right)

One little girl in particular never failed to remind me daily how many days I had left. She didn't want me to go. Everyday she'd say "Do you have to go? Whyyyyyyyy? I don't want you to go. Please stay." lol No wonder it was even harder for me to leave this adorable class. (She gave me a sweet card-see left picture...it made my heart melt.) The great thing about teaching versus student teaching is that I'll keep teaching at the same school (Lord willing) and so I'll be able to see the students the following year. I am going to surprise these students and show up at their Open House next month and hopefully I'll be able to Substitute Teach for them one day. :)

I had such a great experience in my first placement for Student Teaching. It was truly a blessing. I came across something in my Dream Journal that I believe is a clear picture of my Master Teacher. It was from December of 2009. I wrote "I remember being in a classroom and I was helping a teacher I met the week before. She was a great teacher-disciplined her students and was strict, but not too much. Just enough to have her students love her. I think it was second grade". :) And, I prayed before my placement that it would be right where God wants me to be. I heard horror stories about Student Teaching and I knew God is full of blessings. I confidently walked into this placement knowing He had a purpose for me there. I gained so much from this experience.




 One of the things that I believe was definitely a gift from God is my Master Teacher. She truly is a phenomenal teacher. She's sweet, loving, patient, kind, compassionate, caring, and the list goes on. She's very organized and well prepared. She always gets things done right away when she is asked to do something by someone. She even completes things in advance. Sometimes, I'd call her the little fairy. lol I'd be doing something such as making copies or teaching a small group and going about my day when suddenly I'd notice a change in the classroom. The vocab words would be changed for the following week, something new would be put up, copies that were my responsibility would get done. I was amazed at her ability to use her time wisely. She only took a break during lunch and recess. She'd work through every minute of every day that she had available, whether that be planning, prepping, or teaching. Even when there were only two minutes left before Recess, she'd say...Ok friends, we have two minutes left and I'm going to use it, so let's do this....That reminds me of something else I picked up on and love. She called her students "friends". I love that and definitely used it myself and know one day I will when I have my own classroom. Another great thing about my teacher is that she was so open to communication. We had many conversations after school about life in general. I really enjoyed talking with her. She and I both knew this was the start of something new for us. We will be lifelong friends. I will be babysit her kids. She will be my Teaching Mentor. I am completely blessed to have had such a great experience in my first 8 weeks of Student Teaching and God deserves all the glory for that. He truly works ALL things together for our good. (See Romans 8:28 in the Bible)

Teachers teach because they care about their students and want them to be successful learners. My Master Teacher surprised me with the students on the second to last day. Some parents came, they posted a sign and showered me with love and gifts. I almost cried. I opened the door and this is what I saw:



(Imagine 20 kids yelling "Good Luck Ms. Elder!" all at once and hearing "Goodbye Ms. Elder" lol while seeing the students altogether and then proceed to try and give me hugs all at once) It was a moment I'll never forget. I wanted to show some photos of what they gave me as gifts because they were so near and dear to my heart. I was given a tote bag with teaching patches on one side and the students from Room 6's signatures on the other side. Each student gave me their favorite book to start my classroom library. Mrs. Hishmeh put together a book with the students pictures and a note to me below their picture. I will post the notes only. :) Now you can see why I love teaching so much and can't wait to jump into this profession. I know this is what God created me to do and I can't wait to have my own classroom one day. I can't believe that time is almost here! Enjoy this journey with me through the photos. :)



   























Learning As I Go

Room 6 and I on "Who-ville/Crazy Hair day"
(Keep in mind I'm running on 4 hours of sleep because I went to a concert the night before in Anaheim that got done really late and feeling sick)



Two weeks ago was very interesting. I forgot about crazy sock day, so I made sure to remember crazy hair day (as seen above). I was sick all week with a cough, but it only got worse as the week went on. I was under the impression that I could not miss any days during student teaching, even if I was sick. So, mentally I was pushing through any sickness and learning how to "toughen-up". That didn't last too long before the principal and secretary of the school sent me home on Thursday morning. They both said I sounded terrible and I needed to get some rest and take it easy. They reminded me that I can pass along any sickness I have to others if I stay, and told me not to worry about missing a day of student teaching because I needed to go home. So, I followed their orders and headed home to go back to sleep. I went to the doctor, who gave me some antibiotics and a note saying I was to stay home from work for 48 hours. It seemed as though I kept sleeping and waking up, not feeling any better. I finally felt more refreshed on Friday morning when I woke up.

I had my third observation during this week from the Site Supervisor (She is from the University observes me teach and gives me feedback four times during each 8 week period student teaching). Afterwards, I had the opportunity to write down some notes of things that I realized from this observation. This observation helped me recognize that I am learning as I go.

-I always see the negative and what doesn't go well first

-Another second grade teacher (Amy Pobst) said that flexibility is key in teaching; hardly ever do things go as you expect them to. (Amy is only in her first year teaching, but you wouldn't know it because she's a phenomenal teacher!)

-This reminds me of Yvette Henry's advice from her father. She shared this with me over coffee (as she is a teacher, too) so she can relate to this all. It's as simple as three words. Adapt, Adjust, and Overcome.

*Carol (my site Supervisor) said sometimes the unexpected can be a good thing- For example, I called certain students to the back table to meet with me so that we could go over their seatwork together. (the lowest and highest group) This is called differentiation, meeting the needs of all your students.This did not go as I anticipated. I expected to go through a math group in the same way that reading groups go- discussing everything altogether. Instead, the students were talking and working more independently. Each of them were at a different place on the page, so I did my best to check each student's work. I encouraged them to use the pattern blocks to double check their work. I was surprised to see that the lowest group all knew what to do. They didn't need my extra help/guidance because the whole class instruction was great. They understood how to combine plane figures to make a new figure and I wouldn't have noticed this good thing if Carol hadn't pointed it out to me. I was learning as I go that things don't go the way we expect them to sometimes, but it can be a good thing.

I learned on this day (Tuesday) that I don't like observations because I don't feel like I'm completely myself when I'm teaching and being observed by someone other than my Master Teacher. I feel like I rush through it and I'm "frazzled" or frantic to complete the lesson. I feel like the students don't understand anything because I move through it too quickly. Despite me feeling all of these things, the Site Supervisor still had good things to say and she said that overall the lesson went really well. I think it's hard to see that we're not perfect. Even though we're not, we still sometimes strive to be perfect and dislike making mistakes and failing. (I say "we" even though I am speaking for myself, because I am guessing you can relate to this on some level)

The principal of Solana Vista posts quotes from John Wooden on the announcements and weekly bulletins. They always encourage me. Here are a couple of them:

If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doing anything. I'm positive that a doer makes mistakes. John Wooden

 

Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability. John Wooden

 

Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be. John Wooden

 

Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming. John Wooden

Recap

This post should be short and sweet about my experiences thus far as Ms. Elder. I will be posting some pictures as well. :)

I've learned that life as Ms. Elder is hard, but it is so rewarding and well worth it. I've only been student teaching now for four weeks total, and I have four more weeks to go at Solana Vista Elementary School in Second Grade with Mrs. Hishmeh. After that, I switch to Skyline with Mrs. Durward in a 5-6th combo class. Time sure if flying by fast, and I'll definitely miss the second graders in Mrs. Hishmeh's class as well as her. I can't say enough how much of a blessing it has been working at a wonderful school with a phenomenal teacher. It amazes me how quickly you can become attached to the students in your class.

Today I came to realize some parallels with teaching and my daily life in regards to time. Throughout a given day, my teacher uses every minute of the day-whether that be doing prep work, teaching, or planning for the following week. The same should be true for my life at home. I need to be using my time wisely, not wasting any minute of the day. Another parallel is that when we plan for the following week, every single time, at least one thing changes in the schedule. Sometimes it changes right after we plan, other times it changes during the day or week to follow. The same is true with my life outside of teaching. I make plans and set a schedule, but most of the time, my to-do list changes or doesn't all get accomplished. I also have discovered that you learn as you go how to do things well; you make mistakes and sometimes fail; but that doesn't stop you from getting up and moving ahead in teaching. The same is true with life. Hardship and challenges come, but that does not mean we stop everything and give up. We get up again and continue on this journey.

I would like to introduce you to my fabulous Master/Cooperating Teacher! Here is a short video clip of her teaching. Now you can see why I rave about her so much ;)

Here are some pictures below from Mrs. Hishmeh's classroom that she allowed me to share. Isn't it adorable? :)

Now I will show you a couple of pictures of things that I taught (on chart paper, in small groups) and helped contribute to the idea (tree of love).

Here are some pictures of what the students have been working on and/or learning.

So, a recap thus far has been that teaching is a lot of work. So much more goes into it than you think. Teachers care mostly about the success of their students and with each student being unique, with their own learning style, it is challenging to differentiate the curriculum. This means making sure each student is receiving the appropriate work at their level (approaching, on-level, beyond). I've learned that teaching will involve making mistakes. I've learned that I would actually love to teach second grade. They are so adorable, love to learn, and they are a bundle of joy. They are quite the chatterbox, but know how to show respect if you expect it from them. I've enjoyed my week off, but I can't wait to see the students again. I've learned that some days are harder than others. I've learned that when I pursue Him with all my heart, and ask for Him to help me, the days are much easier and better than if I don't include God in them. And, of course, I love grading papers. I love using a planner. I love getting organized. (Staying organized is key) I love children and look forward to more years as Ms. Elder.